The Toxicity of Doubting Others

Understanding the heart Doubt

Understanding Every time we have the idea of doubting others, whether they are really bad or not, we create a very toxic energy in our minds.

It's hard to believe that what we see in the present moment isn't exactly what the object is. That's the warning of science. We have great faith in scientific achievement, but science still considers itself to have many limitations, especially the confusion that leads to the ontology crisis of our world. Science does not know exactly what the nature of all phenomena actually is, what conditions they converge to manifest. Immanuel Kant, the German philosopher, said: "What we know about reality is that it appears exactly as we see it. Reality is what it is, we never know with the nature of a scientific understanding." David Bohm, a brilliant American quantum scientist, agreed, adding: "The electrons that we see suddenly appear and change their structure constantly, because they are controlled by quantum potential." According to this, David Bohm's quantum field must contain consciousness, not be limited by space and act on each other instantaneously.

Thus, what we consider to be true is only of relative value in human perception. And that right is limited once again by each person's level and the evolution of time. Because reality is always moving and linking, we are fixed and isolated. Just as our understanding of the river is certainly far from that of the fish. And a person who is "thirsty" to look at the river is not the same as a person sitting on a yacht, or a person who wants to do hydroelectric business. A certain poet said, "Only the river can understand me." But it's not sure. I don't know much about myself. When we love we feel different, when we hate we feel different, when we are happy we feel different, when we are sad we feel different. The sight of an artist is of course very different from that of a businessman; The vision of a psychic is also very different from that of a politician. So what's the right thing to see? There's no one that feels right. To live in the midst of a relative world, we have to accept the relative view. That's also why we only get relative happiness—happiness that is always conditioned.

Only when we are able to break free from this very disturbing emotion that protects this isolated misunderstanding, to accept that everything throughout the universe is our body, will we have a transcendent level of awareness that is true to reality.

But what's the point of looking at reality? Is it a matter of illusion or the work of science alone? Not. The purpose of science is also to serve human understanding, helping people get closer and closer to the functioning of the universe. Although we are so busy with life, we have no desire to understand what the ontology of this world is for, but the truth is that ourselves and everything around us are in the orbit of cause and effect and dependent birth. So the less we know the truth, the more energy we waste fighting for things that work contrary to nature. The more contrary nature will be, the faster it will destroy. It is the source of all suffering.

Yet we always consider ourselves brilliant, know it all, can hold the future and happiness in our hands. What about getting a PhD? Can that knowledge help us know where anger comes from and what resources are driven by it? Is our understanding of our inner world unrealistic? Does it directly affect the quality of our lives? Wouldn't it be so unfortunate to sacrifice all these years just to grasp what was still within the chance of the situation? Even more unfortunate is living among the fake that we suspect is real, or living in the midst of the real that we suspect is false.

Indian Buddhist tales tell a very tragic story. There was a very wealthy merchant, but his wife died early and left him a son. Because he was busy buying and selling far away, he had to ask people in the house to take care of his children. One day bandits came to burn down the village, causing many people to lose their lives in that fire. Knowing his son was also trapped in the fire, the merchant fainted. After cremation, he took some of his son's ashes and put them in a brocade bag. Everywhere he went, he took it with him, and cried every night. Suddenly one night, outside there was the sound of a child claiming to be his child. But he thought it was a ghost or that the children of the village were coming to troll, so he insisted on not opening the door. In fact, his child was only taken back to the forest by bandits, and the charred baby he mourned was another child in the village. But he never knew that truth when his doubts and bigotry closed his heart and drove his child away in despair.

Life always has stories like that. Sometimes the truth has come knocking and we refuse to open it. Because we are still convinced that our judgments are absolutely true. It is an attitude of obstinacy, clinging to old accumulated knowledge and experience to look at new reality. To some extent, of course, accumulated knowledge and experience are precious human possessions. But if we don't know how to use it properly and rationally, it becomes great walls of prejudice and prejudice that separate us from the truth. While everything is inherently constantly moving and changing. Although we look at the external situation we see nothing different from before, the truth is that they are not the same as all we understand about them.

Therefore, clinging to our knowledge without opening our hearts to explore and learn more, we remove ourselves from the natural workings of life. Although we are present with reality, we have lost sight of reality.

When we don't understand the truth, it's easy to develop an attitude of doubt as a kind of response to defend our selfish ego. Because most of our doubts assume that the other person may be the bad guy, we rarely doubt the opposite. While the essence of doubt is just the attitude of questioning, speculating, or trying to make other possible hypotheses. So it is also a good opportunity for us to embark on the work of discovering more facts about that object. But our "classic" habit is that when we doubt something, we are almost certain that it is true, not wanting to investigate or discover any more. Even when we are provided with clearly substantiated information to help us better understand the object, we are not easily open to acceptance. We always think: "Trace the river to the sea easily / Whoever takes a ruler measures people's hearts." We turn the reminder to be careful when putting faith into an immutable mantra to cover up our fear, weakness, and lack of responsibility. So, sometimes the truth is palpable, but we drown in delusions, and then fall into false perceptions and judgments.

The more we live in comfortable conditions, the weaker our internal strength becomes. Our keen observation to determine right from wrong or falsehood is no longer as sharp as it used to be. We have put our lives outside too much, hoping for happiness from others is too great, so we are always afraid of adversity coming. If we have ever been deceived, rolled around in business or politics, it is easy to develop the habit of being wary of everyone, even loved ones. "Without fire, how can there be smoke", we often use this image to decipher all problems. While in fact no problem is exactly the same as the other. Just as smoke doesn't have to come from fire, because even cold air can produce it.

As soon as the other person doesn't show any suspicious signals, they are nice and nice, we know that but we still can't resist our suspicion. I think it's better to be suspicious than to be mistaken. That's a huge flaw of psychological mechanisms. If left untreated, sooner or later it will turn to a more severe level such as judgment or slander. While a person has strong internal strength, he never suspects others of doing bad things to him. Because they have the ability to respond calmly to all fluctuations.

What if my suspicions were completely true? What outcome do we want? It seems that we are trying to expose the other person's weaknesses or flaws, so that we stay away or encourage others to ostracize them, not to understand and love them better. Most of our doubts are for the purpose of ego gratification, even if we speak up on behalf of a group or community. Is it possible that, in the name of morality or kindness, we pay attention to things or beauty to praise, and those suspicious expressions remain silently observing and seeking help? Why don't we respect them even though we have some doubts about them? Why don't we ask ourselves because he is worth our suspicion or because he or she has such a severe suspicion disease? Why don't we dare apologize to our partner when we find out that we wronged them? Therefore, doubt often only makes us weaker and more cowardly.

Little did we know that every time we had the idea of doubting others, whether they were really bad or not, there was a very toxic energy in our minds. It both burns away the peaceful energy in us and makes us lose the opportunity to interact with mysterious life. Because we're always preoccupied with looking for more evidence. Although we haven't uttered a word or action to express our doubts, once we've turned our attention to the other person to send our doubts, we've sent out bad energy. Rather, we owe them a bad feeling. According to the "law of emotional balance," they will seek to return us another corresponding bad emotion, if they recognize that our suspicion is of a bad nature. Otherwise, the universe will ask another object to return us another bad feeling. Worst of all, if we doubt a benevolent, virtuous being—where the universe's abundant energies gather—the consequences will be incalculable. It's a huge emotional debt that I and my children and grandchildren have paid off for generations. So, never let go of doubt easily. Practice self-remorse or express remorse directly when you discover that you have wrongfully wronged someone to neutralize some of the consequences.

In fact, doubt is sometimes a very necessary attitude. In the meditation tradition, meditators must question their own disturbing emotions or any phenomena that occur in front of them without absolute confidence in the successful experiences of previous masters. "Great enlightenment" – the greater the doubt, the greater the enlightenment. For the more doubts, the stronger the power of discovery, the more they leave behind framed sights. When it is very mysterious, yogis will ask the help of a Zen master with questions that have been carefully distilled. But a true Zen master rarely gives a definite answer. Even the suggestions of the Zen master are often very "out of place" to break the shy attitude of wanting to rely on the knowledge of others, or to force the meditator to immediately stop the useless theoretical question. Eventually, meditators struggle to confront their own walls of old perceptions and disturbing emotions in search of answers.

A true yogi is always responsible for his own doubts, when he sets out to rush to find the right answer, not throw it away and still be the same five or ten years later. The question of the yogi always lies in awareness, but full of freedom. It is quite different from the disease of doubt to protect the weak, fearful, irresponsible egos of hobbyists who find fault in others.

Light the meditation
lamp Keep the mind sacred
Look at life with right view
Penetrate through the heart of the night.

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